Welp today I was 3 for 3 on crying kiddos at day camp drop off— and then I cried. Mommy tears for the win. I wasn’t like ugly crying or anything, though the guilt/trifecta teary kid punch caused some serious pink nose, puddly eyes on the ride home. The fact that I didn’t pack the right shirt for the oldest or cup for the middle child were just mere slaps in the face to get the process rolling. All in all, I was fine by the first stop light. Now it’s up to those trusty, cheery camp counselors to do their magic. I got sh*t to do.
I also don’t feel sooo guilty because I’ve been mommin’ pretty hard core for like, I dunno, eleven straight days during the post school-pre camp lull. I know that doesn’t sound like a lot, but we had to get real creative with crafts and games and manner-teaching incentives. While the sunscreen lather process, packing towels and toys and snacks and diapers and such is a task for any beach or pool outing, I must say I loved not having to pack 1 lunchbox, fight any said child on ensemble selection or wrestle anyone out of bed and rush ANYWHERE for those days. Curfews were broken and only some teeth got brushed, and I loved every……well– a lot, of those minutes. Phone on silent and calendar on pause. It was pure lovely to check out for a bit.
However, that said, I missed a BIG, HUGE, date! That’s right…..cuuuuue the**** confetti cannons****!! GNOTED turned 1 year old :) Phew! We made it. I don’t always get to post as much as I’d like to, so some of those goals went unmet, though simply having the internet police not shut me down for inappropriate or lame content—- achieved! Yay. All thanks to YOU, fellow friend. Thank you for your support.
So back to–> leaving my last drop off, lump in throat, tears in eyes today. I pulled it together with some deep breaths, and surprisingly, rational thinking. Maybe I’m just tired, as that is NOT something to get soft about. Your kids are getting to go to camp. They’re not digging that they aren’t in their old classroom where they felt safe and knew the layout? They didn’t recognize some of the new faces? Starting the morning with building blocks instead of carpet time really threw them? Well, putting those toes outside of the comfort zone is a good thing. For anyone. If you find yourself in a “rut”, I’d say that’s almost impressive because there is no doubt for me, (in the great words of Greek Philosopher Heraclitus), the only constant in life is change. I love a double meaning, a play on words and I love this concept. It couldn’t be more true. Change is an always-to-be-expected condition. There are many times when I think, things are going too well, and I get anxious about that. Why is that? Can’t I just freakin’ enjoy it? Apparently, I’m not alone. Recently I was chatting with a doctor friend who was explaining the difference between anxiety versus depression. They can certainly drive each other. I picture them like two rough kids with bad intentions trying to be the worst influence on one another. :) However, at the same time, they are both very different. She explained (in her words) that depression has to do with a “fear” or unresolved sadness from the past, while anxiety is fear of the future (uncertainty). I have never seen emotions broken down through this type of lens. It’s helpful to know when these feelings of anxiousness and overwhelmed and such come creeping in that side door, these states can be broken down and you can get to the nitty gritty on why you are feeling what you are feeling– and then hammer that sh*t out!
SO- there is your dose of psych-babble for today. I’m gonna take on some stretches and just accept that even though some of my gang was wishing they were back in their comfy zone on the couch prepping for a day of home play, they are in for some new camp adventures. And there aint’ nothing to worry about (Knock. On. Wood ;) . Here’s hoping for a kick a$$ report from all– and your campers too! And/or just you having a solid work day, etc. It’s all applicable :)