Gripes & Likes: Piece’a Chip.

I promise not to turn this into a gripe forum, but sometimes you just gotta vent. So I’ll make a deal with you– for every few b*tches, I’ll list a few things I’m digging at the moment. We’ll call it a “gripes & likes” series.

Here goes. Oh the chip reader. You are an annoying gripe in my life these days. (I know, I know–  for this to be a chief complaint takes shallow to a new level. But I really just need to get this off my chest.) Admittedly I don’t do well with change, but I try, for the sake of my family, to move forward with the times and technology. (I still can’t come to grips with tossing my CDs– just yet.) I cannot begin to tell you how much I despise the “chip reader” for credit and debit cards. Is this considered an advancement? Let me tell ya, in *no* way is this productive for someone who is 100% multi-tasking at every turn (ala extreme ADD). Sometimes I think this is an evil development designed by my husband for me to charge less. The whole process of like– is the card inserted? Is the card inserted enough? Then I keep nervously checking the screen to see if more action is required, then I look away to tend to a child or put my wallet back in my bag- but WAIT- I can’t put my wallet back in my bag— because the reader still has my card and is **still reading**… Then another distraction pops up and I bend down to pick up a dropped item from said child. The next thing I know I’m being handed a receipt and the sweet clerk is telling me to have a nice day and I’m on the move out of the store.  No card in possession. I don’t even need to get into the detail of what kind of frustration being CARD-LESS when you get home causes. At least now most chip readers are designed with that super angry buzzing noise that yells at you when your card is approved. I personally think the alarm should be more like a confetti cannon or canned applause…I mean, even as an adult it’s nice to be “approved”…am I right? Those can be some palm sweating tick-tock moments :)

Again, I ask you– is this chip reader really considered an upgrade? “They” say it’s for better security for the card user. Honestly, I’m welcoming the idea of taking my chances.  A big contributor to my day is when I have my card in hand preparing for the painful “chip insert process” and I see the little handwritten, ratty paper, taped sign over the chip insert point reading “chip reader disabled; please swipe”. I’m like….yessss..victorrrry!

As promised, as not to make this a place to “biatch” about things, I’ll wrap this up with just a few other annoyances (to get them all out at once) followed by those things that I’m into. Because as I like to say– if you don’t have anything nice to say, just at least end on a positive :)

Gripes:

*The (elusive) fitted sheet- This will always and forever give me heart palpitations. I *never* get it secured correctly on the first try– even if in fact it was turned “the right way”. It’s so wrong in every way. You will always beat me fitted sheet– always.

*The house fly- disgusting, angry, ugly, annoying– and yet such a challenging opponent.

*Mayo- Nothing can ruin a day faster for me than the sight or thought of an abundance of mayo. I won’t even take the time to learn how to spell it’s complete name.  I’ve been told this makes me “so un-southern”.  Sorry I’m not sorry.

*Nosey People- I think this goes without saying….but I’m just not into people acting concerned or thoughtful, but really just wanting some scoop. I thankfully haven’t known a lot of them in my life, but when it’s apparent, it awakens a little inner beast in me.  I’m not that interesting- and if I have any secrets to keep of my friends, family or my own, they have long been buried or forgotten– likely somewhere along the way with my debit card.

*Discovering the gas pump you have selected doesn’t have that handy little lever that holds the trigger in place so it pumps itself- This is just flat out diva, I know. But such a painful waste of time.

….Now…..

Likes: 

*Being outside- Especially when dining. With pals. With cocktails. …Allllll fresco…..Iiiiiii’ll take it.

*Sweater weather- It’s the pinnacle of my year. Period.

*Cold sheets- Is there anything better than when you find that cold spot in the sheets or on the pillow? nope.

*Smell of basil- If you’re having a rough day, dip your nose in a handful of fresh basil. If you don’t see a montage of rainbows and peonies and sunshine and laughter…..get your money back. :)

*Kid laughter- It’s contagious and infectious and will for sure get that cup runnnething over.

I’ll end on these until the next series update. Here’s hoping you find some comfort in griping (misery loves company, right?), and do a lot more liking.

Happy week-ending to all.