‘Nuff Said.

It was an early fall morning and I woke to begin the last of the box packing in my Charleston apartment.  The TV was still plugged in, but resting all alone on the floor in my bright, beautiful Pitt Street nest. I turned it on, not even selecting a channel, just to fill the void of background noise. I was moving rapidly from room to room, accompanied by the intermittent, painful screeching noise of the packing tape dispensing. I wasn’t paying much attention to the programming, but started to notice a theme. There was a plane crash. A horrible one. In New York City. An airplane had just hit The World Trade Center. And then again. The date was September 11, 2001.

…………………………………..

After college I took a project-based PR job with a start-up firm in Charleston, SC. A town where I had grown up spending countless family vacations, my brother attended college (which in turn I crashed a lot ;) and I held many a summer job. It felt safe to me. The project my friend (JHB!) and I were hired for was to assist the PR firm in the opening of the new Krispy Kreme doughnut shop in town. We learned the basics of press releases, media, events, as well as, being on site opening night by 4 AM to throw on a wedge cap and sling some hot n’ now glazed doughnuts to anyone in the vicinity. A safe and valuable transition position for me post-grad. The plan was always for me to head North upon project completion. I was New York City bound (by way of my many family members helping me find some work and a stellar pool house roof over my head while I searched — shout out to all my kin! Especially Kiernans, Garretts and Boehlys! ;)

I was to turn over my apartment keys on September 11th and drive North to my parents’ house for a few days. Then on to the Big Apple with plans to stop in DC along the way. All with my trusty road warrior gal pal and great friend (ESC!).

These weren’t the days (nicely) when you were attached to your smart phone. I didn’t even have a smart phone. It was like a Motorolla clam phone. That morning I noticed that I had several missed calls from my parents. And as I paused on the packing and began listening to what was happening, the gory, devastating story was unfolding. And it was made clear this was an attack. And New York wasn’t the only target.

Because there was a lot of unknown, I stayed glued to the TV but continued with my plan. I finally packed up the TV, turned in the key and stayed glued to the radio for the next three and a half hours until I got to my parents’ house. What a terrible tragedy. With still so much confusion and fear surrounding it all.

Days passed hearing the heartbreaking and agonizing stories on the news, and especially for one of the sweetest towns I know, Garden City, New York. My friend HFL and her town lost an unspeakable count of friends and neighbors working as emergency responders and in the towers. I still think of them regularly and am inspired by how strong they remain.

It was time to decide. Do I stay or do I go? The discussion really actually never made it to the table. We went. ESC and I left 8 (?) days after the attacks with a feeling of being on a mission. Maybe to help in some way. We hoped, but really didn’t know. We were gonna try, and also, as advised, not let these horrific acts impact living the life that you have to hold onto.

I was gainfully (ha) hired and living in New York by early 2012 and spent 8 incredible, humbling years in the city.

I go back at least once a year to remember it. Refamiliarize myself. The subways, the old haunts, old neighborhoods, Central Park, old work walk routes. And also to remember who I was then. It was a town and a time of peaks and valleys. Struggles and triumphs. It’s true what they say, I think—if you can make it there, you can make it anywhere. I applaud my friends still kickin it there like champs.

For some reason heading back this weekend to be with my old NYC cronies—the energy feels different. I have made quick trips to Manhattan with my daughter, my husband, friends—but this trip has/d a different buzz about it. We (JHB, JEA and CAD) are celebrating the dearest of souls (JEA!) and her engagement (woohoo!). But the most fun about it is that we all connected in the City— during some of those struggling times. Good times too. Many, many good times. Too many to count. We have all been through a lot together. We have been in those trenches. And now we are coming together from San Fran, Charleston, Savannah and NYC to do the City as “adults” together— Looooots of adulting, I’m sure ;) We are crashing at our gracious hostess’s one-bedroom apartment, to which my husband commented, “Wha? Aren’t y’all like 40? Can’t get a hotel?”.  Look- this is how we know this place together. It’s how we entertained all those years. Bodega wine deliveries, cash dinners and being inappropriately old for our late night dives ;) Please don’t ask us what year we are at NYU this time.

That’s the NYC that I love. The kind where I’m not stressing about what fancy preschool my kid gets into or how to know which black car is my driver. Just the basics; the subway, the taxis, the street meat, walks along the Hudson,  the free of charge beauty of the park and deep thoughts aside Bethesda Terrace. It teaches you a lot about yourself. Humbling, cut you at the knees, but also brings you back up in a way you didn’t know a town could. Its beauty, its history, its grit, its sophistication, its efficiency, its warmth, its chill–it’s everything to me….. Even the bad parts are some of its shiniest charms. When people used to say to me “you’re so lucky to have all of that great shopping in New York.”, I would laugh because what they didn’t know is that I just had to rob my bank account with cash withdrawals upon immediate pay check deposit just so all of my checks wouldn’t clear and drain the account first. A viscous cycle I tell you. So, shopping really wasn’t ever on the agenda.

Yeah, times have changed a little, but as I write this I’m still only planning to go to Zara while I’m here. No Madison Ave. for me. Not yet anyway. Here’s to all of those friends and family that I have come to cherish beyond belief over those years spent in this beloved place. And all of those special friends and family that I was able to play with on your trips through town during my time as a NYC resident. I think of all of those times on building rooftops, outside sidewalks intended as outdoor dining, tiny apartments, tiny restaurants, etc….I’m lucky to have you all and those memories. Just feeling nostalgic as I touch down today in this place. Perhaps I’ll even squeeze another update post from the trip. Stay tuned…

I love you so hard, New York.